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 A contractor married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.
On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, my first husband was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
My second husband was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
My third husband was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.
My fourth husband was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
My fifth husband was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
My sixth husband was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
My seventh husband was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
My eigth husband was a therapist: all he ever did was talk about it.
My ninth husband was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
My tenth husband was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
"You're a contractor. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"
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